Paradiso Perduto

There are times when I felt so worthless. I could not get anything right. Life was one wrong decision after another. There are times when I wished I could just shrink shrink shrink and then vanish, as if I was never here before. People might hate me. I didn't blame them; I hated myself too. People didn't want to be approached by me, and that's fine, I couldn't stand being me, too.  Then my supervisor drove me home because apparently I look like someone who would break down with an ugly, inconsolable cry in the middle of traffic jam. Then I realized that I haven't eaten anything but my grandma prepared my favorite food for dinner. Then I texted random message to my best friend way past after her sleeping time, and she unexpectedly replied. Then I was told that people miss me -me!- and they might sent me messages but I was unable to read it because my silly phone was broken. Then I read nice things people posted on internet and I thought it would be nice if

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